That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Small penises have feelings too.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize