Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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