people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
