have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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