Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
