we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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