i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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