Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
