That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
