she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
