his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize