Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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