O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
