no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
