btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
