Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
