The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
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