Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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