when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
