Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize