grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize