Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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