shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
