Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
whose ass print is on the piano?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
