While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I think your dad took our porno
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Randomize
