i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
