last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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