it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I hope mine doesn't look like that
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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