NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
