So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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