My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
