And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize