Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
