naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
