Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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