i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize