you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Randomize
