I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
