you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize
