You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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