the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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