I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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