I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
