Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Randomize
