Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize