I wanna bring you to show and tell
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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