i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Randomize
