He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
