They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
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