I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
